make you a sandwich?

brother/dad/boy:
sure i'll go make you a sandwich!
but real fast....
i know you're working a 40-hour week and all, but i need you to scoop the dog poo, mow the lawns, prune the trees, go get my car washed and the oil changed, paint the siding on the house, help me rearrange the very heavy furniture, and give me money for groceries and other expenses.
the toilets need cleaning, and i would totally do that myself, but since i am a woman i am definitely not tough enough for the job.
please be on call for if i ever get a flat tire or my car breaks down.
and come pick me up and drive me when i don't feel like using the gas in my own vehicle.
continue paying for my meals and movie tickets, and feel free to buy me expensive gifts.
and you should probably double up on reps, you're looking a little flabby lately.
what did you want on your sandwich?

-kandi